NBA Action: It’s Fan-tastic.
So as if there wasn’t a ton of other stuff happening, the NBA season tips off tonight, and here are my predictions as to who is going to win each division, and who we think would be cool to win each division. We gots some refs, now let’s do this:
Eastern Conference
Atlantic Division
Who Will Win: The Celtics
Garnett, Allen, Pierce, and now Sheed, have to have one more run in them, and this is going to be it. Don’t think this team can keep rolling beyond this season, because their combined age is 4,765.
Who I Want to Win: The Nets
Now this isn’t because I lived in New Jersey for a year, and because I used to work for the Nets, but it’s because I would love for them to do well, so they can get the Brooklyn Arena approved and the Russian billionaire can take over the team. And because I used to live in New Jersey, and I used to work for them. Very solid franchise, and good people, but it is really going to be tough.
Central Division
Who Will Win: The Cavaliers
King James (although I have no idea what he is the King of) and Shaq have enough to win this division, especially since most of the teams in the division got marginally better. Also, Delonte West is Rambo.
Who I Want to Win: The Pacers
They went crazy and drafted Tyler Hansbrough, to give them a total of six white guys on their team. Does no one else think it is crazy, that INDIANA, where big white folk grow on trees, and where the greatest white guy to ever play, Larry Bird, runs the front office, is starting to fulfill their own stereotype? I think it’s fun. Also, Danny Granger might be the most underrated all-star in the league.
Southeast Division
Who Will Win: The Magic
Dwight Howard is a Jesus-powered beast, and Vinsanity while be a nice complement. Plus, Matt Barnes and Brandon Bass are great pick ups.
Who I Want to Win: The Bobcats
I just like the color orange. Plus, I really want to see that Franchise do well. My fiance’s parents live in North Carolina, so maybe if I hype them up, I can get a free trip to see her parents while I go to Time Warner Cable Arena (yes they have the worst corporate sponsor). It’s going to be hard with Raja Bell injured, and Tyson Chandler still asleep in New Orleans. But don’t worry, Michael Jordan is in the front office.
WESTERN CONFERENCE
Northwest Division
Who Will Win: The Trail Blazers
It’s two words. Trail Blazers. Lot of people make it one word.
Who I Want To Win: The Seattle Supersonics
Why the fuck is their a team in Oklahoma City? Fuck you David Stern for allowing that sale to happen. Epic Fail. But for an actual team, I will say, The Thunder of Oklahoma City because they have orange in their uniforms, and Kevin Durant’s game is really nice.
Southwest Division
Who Will Win: The Spurs
Adding Richard Jefferson adds some youth to a team that is 5,987, 876 years old combined. I think they will be strong and push the Lakers in the Western Conference Finals (oops gave away my conference predictions).
Who I Want to Win: The Mavericks
I just love Dirk, and I think that he deserves more than some of the playoff debacles he has been a part of. It would be nice to see him rise above some of his relationship issues as well. God his ex-girlfriend was KRAZY!
Pacific Division
Who Will Win: The Lakers
Who I Want To Win: The Lakers
I am a huge Lakers fan, so this is not a shocker, but I do think that there is no team in this division that comes even close. Maybe the Clippers.
NBA CHAMPION: Lakers
The Lakers will beat the Celtics in six games. This is of course if the “Flash Forward” that Courtney B Vance character has on the show “Flash Forward”, in which he states that Kobe tears his ACL on April 29th, does not come true. It better not Courtney. Wipe that smile off your face.

Check back in June to see how I did!
Tags: cavaliers, comedy, lakers, lebron, nba preview, nets